Terry

Terry, jangan la menangis, relek la.

Bukan salah anda, dah padang tu basah, nak buat guano lagi. True champions will come back from setbacks.

But of course headlines will go like: "JOHN Terry is destined to go down in European football history as the man who only had to score a penalty to win the Champions League – and missed."

His good old friend said: "You can see what it means to John," said Lampard afterwards. "He's Mr Chelsea, Chelsea through and through. He wanted this more than anyone at the club. Not many centre-halves would have stood up there and taken the fifth penalty, a penalty of that importance, in the shoot-out. That's testament to the man. No one at Chelsea will criticise him at all. John's a man's man. He did what he did and he will be back."

We can choose to remember the fantastic 130 minutes and the saved goal, or the unfortunate missed penalty at the end. I will choose the former even though the latter seems to be the most crucial part of the game.

Apa la aku ni dok cakap pasal bola pulak, sokong pasukan yahud... pulak tu. Membazir masa je tengok bende-bende ni. Em, betul kot, tetapi aku banyak je bazir masa dengan benda-benda lain. I am always thrilled to follow the life and stories of any grandmasters and champions in their respective fields. They are inspirations for me.

Jauhilah Memburukkan Manusia atas Nama Tuhan!

Kenapa kita (manusia) lemah terlalu cepat mahu menghukum sesama manusia ? Tidak perlu menjadi dukun, meramal situasi orang lain sebaliknya anda cuma perlu memperbaiki situasi diri anda dan keadaan yang berlaku dengan beramal sebagai manusia yang baik setiap masa, di mana-mana dan suka membantu dan merahmati orang lain.

"Melayani orang lain seperti mana anda ingin diri anda dilayani."

Jadilah Hamba yang Penyayang kepada Tuhan Yang Penyayang

Sabda rasululah :

"Orang-orang yang penyayang, mereka itu akan disayangi oleh Allah Tabaaraka wa Ta'ala (Yang Maha berkat dan Maha Tinggi). oleh kerana itu sayangilah orang-orang yang di muka bumi, nescaya zat yang di atas langit akan menyayangi kamu". (Hadis Sahih. Diriwayatkan oleh Abu Dawud No. 4941. Ahmad 2/160. Hakim 4/159. dari jalan Abdullah bin 'Amr bin 'Ash. Hadis ini telah disahihkan oleh Imam Hakim dan telah pula disetujui oleh Imam Zahabi)

Juga disebut dalam hadis yang lain :

"Barangsiapa yang tidak menyayangi orang yang di muka bumi, nescaya tidak akan disayang oleh zat yang di atas langit". (Hadis Sahih, diriwayatkan oleh Imam Thabrani di kitabnya "Mu'jam Kabir No. 2497 dari jalan Jarir bin Abdullah. Imam Zahabi)

Perlu bagi para pendakwah (penyeru) agama ini memahami bahawa matlamat Islam ialah membawa manusia kepada jalan yang diredhai tuhan dan ianya berlaku dengan penuh kewaspadaan dan jauh dari kecelaruan dan kecuaian.

Oleh itu wajar seruan menuju kepada tuhan dilakukan dengan berhati-hati dan penuh keikhlasan untuk menyeru manusia menuju kebaikan dan kebahagian bukan untuk memuaskan hati sesiapa atau untuk mencapai apa-apa kepentingan.

Sekiranya anda tidak dapat melakukan usaha seruan, sering terpesong oleh belitan syaitan dengan asyik suka menghukum dan memburukkan mana-mana manusia di atas nama tuhan maka hentikanlah dakwah anda kepada kami, kerana kami manusia yang berdosa ini tidak mahukan wakil tuhan yang hanya tahu menghukum kami tetapi kami memerlukan wakil manusia yang akan mengeluarkan kami dari dosa membantu kami dari kesalahan dan membimbing kami menuju keredhaan.

Lailahaillallah....wahdahu la syarikalah...

Moga pintu taubat masih terbuka untuk kami ya Allah

Berikanlah kami wakil dan pemimpin yang akan membantu kami

bukan orang-orang yang hanya tahu mencela dan menghina kami

menyusahkan hidup kami di atas pembohongan nama-Mu ya Allah !

* Pesanan untuk diri sendiri. Moga aku dapat belajar menjadi hamba Tuhan, dan bukan omong-omongan kosong sahaja. Dipetik daripada cebisan post Antara Wakil Tuhan dan Hamba Tuhan, Sangat Jauh Beza Maksudnya!

Sebenarnya

Sebenarnya aku tiada taqwa,
Aku hanya insan gila,
Aku menipu kalian saja,
Dan juga diri aku sendiri,
Aku ingin mencari al-Ghazali,
Tetapi tidak ku temui,
Hati aku kotor dan berdaki,
Aku perlu muhasabah diri,
Pergi, mencari diri.

p/s: My true friends are those who have showed me my real weaknesses - only my egoistic self failed to appreciate it. I can't thank you enough. My real weakness is I always think I am right, but often time I am wrong. Ustaz sekolah aku kata jahil muraqqab, psychologists kata narcissistic, dan aku sendiri punya term ialah gila. Moga aku sembuh daripada penyakit ini pada masa-masa akan datang =)

"We Are Only Peacemakers"

Ali ibn Abu Talib, a companion of the Prophet who was about to slay his opponent in the midst of battle. As he raised his sword to strike, his enemy spat in his face. Ali immediately dropped his sword and refused to kill his opponent, “What is wrong with you, why do you not strike ?” the man asked “Because before you spat at me I was fighting you for the sake of Allah Almighty” Ali replied, “but after you spat I was fighting you because I was angry - and as a Muslim I can only fight for Allah , never for my own self.” Upon hearing this, Ali’s opponent recognized the nobility and truth of his words and immediately accepted Islam. [I have no idea about it's authenticity]

My Lord, guide me, verilly I am someone weak!

Maybe I think I am a 'peacemaker', but I only create mischief. Forgive me.

My Rambling Musing I

The new semester has arrived. My last semester result is not out yet, but I am not really looking forward to it as I don’t think I did excellent – won’t be too bad either, insyaAllah. Note: I am usually, fairly fatalistic, so nothing to worry about. What’s important right now is to set my priorities right and to find the right balance with my responsibilities and interests – oh yeah, I am a person with multiple interests, and the hardest thing for me is perhaps to really concentrate on one thing at a time.

It is true that it is easy to find a person who hops from one thing to another in an ad hoc manner, but it is a rarity to find someone who is really good at what he or she is doing. That is why grandmasters are envied by many and they are hard to come by – it takes a lot of hard work, rigorous training, and a lot of sweat to produce one. Having said that, I am not negating the need to master multiple skills and knowledge, what I am saying is we should not fall into the trap of ‘jack-of-all-trade-but-master-at-none’. Of course it will be terrific if we can actually be master of multiple disciplines – I hope to be one of those in the future – berangan.

Now back to reality. I need to brush up my C++ skill for this semester and not to mention: Study hard… And Smart? How smart can you get?

I don’t know why, but I find it pretty hard to memorize formulas, facts, and even people’s name nowadays – important stuff. Somehow I have the uncanny ability to memorize strange things and small details that other people tend to forget – unfortunately these memories are not so beneficial, although it can be helpful at rare times. The theory about one's spiritual state affects one's memory is an interesting one. The memory power of the people during the prophetic and pious predecessors time was extraordinary, as Mary Carruthers, author of The Book of Memory writes, "ancient and medieval people reserved their awe for memory. Their greatest geniuses they describe as people of superior memories."1 That brings the question – or rather my paranoia and self-made-up excuse – about how dyslexia affects me nowadays? I no longer write sentences in mirror images, nor do I confuse ‘p’ with ‘q’ or ‘3’ with ‘8.’ I seem perfectly normal nowadays… But I thought my vision was perfectly fine too when actually I needed a pair of glasses.

I’ve been reading studies about theories of memory but it seems that we are still playing the guessing game on how we remember and how we forget. Maybe it’s just me who fail to understand those well-written treatises on this subject. What I can say is “EP” and ”HM” are scary… I hope I can be “AJ.” How do I train a seahorse, or in other word, a hippocampus? What does it mean when you have your neuropathways hardwired in strange ways - dyslexic? They say you get creative people, but deficient in certain aspects – seems familiar. Hope there will be some fatah for me, insyaAllah. On practical solution, maybe I should learn how to use mind maps more effectively to aid me in my studies – after all I think I am a visual learner and I believe my thinking is more conceptual. Note: Change of topic for the next paragraph.

Sometimes I feel like drowning… Sometimes I feel like I am in no man’s land. The voice inside me will say, “Who cares? Well they don’t, it’s your own problem, you have to stand by your own.” Then that voice will add, “It's ok, as long as He is not mad with me.” Now this argument seems familiar. Strange how sometimes I give people advice, but truthfully I myself don’t have the strength when I am in such predicament. Nothing strange perhaps, it’s called moral support – we do that to other people even though sometimes we ourselves have no idea what the solution to the problem really is.

No! I am not Prince Hamlet, nor was meant to be;
Am an attendant lord, one that will do
To swell a progress, start a scene or two,
Advise the prince; no doubt, an easy tool,
Deferential, glad to be of use,
Politic, cautious, and meticulous;
Full of high sentence, but a bit obtuse;
At times, indeed, almost ridiculous—
Almost, at times, the Fool.2

When one sets sail to the sea, it is important to read the stars properly, to have the right compass so that one does not get confuse with his or her direction. I hope that my compass is showing the real North Star. One should only expect that there will be thunderstorms and big tidal waves in the vast, silent seas of uncharted territories. Until then…

“I seek refuge with the glory of Your light, which the heavens and earth are lit form, Your anger will not befall on me, nor Your displeasure descends on me. To You is the supplication until You are pleased, and there is no control or power except by You.”3

Footnotes:-

1. Memory: Why We Remember, Why We Forget by Joshua Foer, National Geographic November 2007.

2. The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock (verses 111-119), T.S. Eliot 1917.

3. A portion of dua Taif incident by Rasulullah s.a.w. (I can't remember the specific chain of narration. Sorry for that.)

Our Current Condition, Our Glorious Past, And The Need For The Two Transformations

Our Current Condition
We live in a time where our community is in the state of ghafla (heedless). A time where our youth waste their precious early life with playing meaningless video games, which is the black hole of our modern society – an activity whose substance is complete nothingness. Our time spend in seclusion used to mean our time spend in remembrance of Allah, but now it means our time spend on watching vulgar images and videos in front of our computers. Today, our heartlands and our hearts are subjugated by inward and outward forces that make us submit to created things, as oppose to Islam’s mission to free us from these powers by submitting to the Creator of things. We should feel ashamed of ourselves when we talk about ‘adab or akhlak, as we no longer personify these noble concepts; in fact, nowadays other communities embody those concepts way better than us. As Syaikh Hamza Yusuf eloquently puts, “generally speaking, we are powerless, bereft, morally bankrupt – objects of history rather than subject of history, as were our pious predecessors who engaged the world with the power of truth and dispelled darkness with their spiritual light.”1

Haven’t we heard about our Prophet’s s.a.w. prayer:-

“O Allah, I seek refuge in you from grief and anxiety, impotence and indolence, cowardice and miserliness, and from being overcome by debt and overpowered by men”2

Our Glorious Past
Dr. Umar Faruq Abdallah stressed the importance for us to put some wind into our sail of ‘memory ship’, so that we have role models from our glorious past, which we can derive our inspirations from. I believe we should study figures in our tradition, especially those who are closest to us in terms of personality, expert field, background, etc. Our role models should be people who are proven to be “serious about their lives” and rightly-guided – we have a lot of people who are like that in our glorious past and some in the present. Having said that, we should not get all hung up with our past, and blame our current condition entirely to ‘others’ fault and get ourselves engross with multiple conspiracy theories that will give us no benefits.

Hamza Yusuf spoke in his lecture, Reviving The Spirit of Andalusia:-
“Our challenge as Muslims is to determine how best we can revive the ability for Islam to work with the great challenges of our time, the great transformations of our time, using the past as our compass. We must recognize that we are in the present, on a journey into the future, and the past is our North Star. We must see the principles of the past and derive strength from our past, but we must also able to reconcile with the fact that we are modern people”

Inner Transformation
Syaikh Hamza Yusuf starts his book, Agenda to Change Our Condition with the topic Taqwa, which highlights his stress on inner transformation - through spiritual struggle with the soul - as a requisite to transform our ailing condition.

There are five stations of taqwa according to Imam Ibn Juzayy al-Kalbi:
- guarding against disbelief – this is the station of submission;
- guarding against forbidden things – this is the station of repentance;
- guarding against doubtful matters – this is the station of scrupulousness;
- guarding against extraneous matters – this is the station of freedom (zuhd);
- guarding against other than Allah occupying the heart – this is the station of vigilance.3

Regarding the theory of five stations propounded by Ibn Juzayy, he said that our community is suffering because the vast majority of us are only at the first or second station, and the benefits of taqwa will spread in our communities only if a critical mass of Muslims commits to moving to the third and fourth stations. In other words, we need to be serious about attaining scrupulousness and zuhd – as was the case for the prophetic and pious predecessors’ communities – if the beauty of Islam is to be truly embodied by the ummah again. Zuhd4 is not a complete avoidance of the world. It is when you have dunya in you hand, but not in your heart. So are we up to the task in elevating our stations at the very least to the third station – and beyond?

“Had only the people of the cities believed and had taqwa, We would have opened up for them blessings from the heavens and the earth” (Qur’an 7:96).

Outer Transformation
Outer transformation is about the struggle with the derogatory aspects of the society, which means upholding social justice and promoting a culture that embodies moral behavior. The inner transformation and the outer transformation should come hand-in-hand – we must change ourselves first before we seek to change the world. If we ourselves are corrupted, then we don’t have the moral authority to change others. Syaikh Hamza Yusuf stresses the need for civic involvement in our behalf as part of our effort to improve the world that we live in. I would like to quote an excerpt of Agenda To Change Our Condition that addresses the issue of cooperation because I think it is relevant to most of us – especially me, maybe, in my disarray:-

“This religion is based on recognizing the abilities of the believers that constitute the ummah and facilitating the use of their respective gifts. We need to understand that if one person focuses upon an area of concern, he or she is complementing our own work and not detracting from it by not joining us. We should not see other Muslims, either individuals or organized groups, as competitors or antagonists. Rather, we should see them as brothers and sisters and either work with them or work separately with amicable relations, the least of which is giving them the greeting of peace with a smile.

Islamic work through diverse organizations should never be the basis for negating the bonds of brotherhood and sisterhood established between us by Islam. When that happens, we are no longer doing Islamic work but are engaged in politics. We should speak well of other organizations or be silent about them. Once we recognize that most of them are engaged in different aspect of the same struggle, we come to respect their efforts. If some appear to be misguided, then we should offer counsel and pray for them. If they have deviant positions or beliefs, then we should request that qualified scholars clarify with clear proofs what those deviations are.

We ought to keep in mind that Mosses a.s. was commanded to go to Pharaoh and speak to him a gentle word (Qur’an 20:44). Remembering that we are not more righteous than Mosses a.s. and that our brother is certainly not father astray than Pharaoh, we can approach the matter with gentle humility and a genuine desire for the well-being and guidance of all.

In addition, we should avoid labeling other people or groups as Salafi, Sufi, or Wahhabi, for example, as these engender animosity. Name-calling is condemned in the Qur’an, if the intention is contempt. If the intention is to elucidate a position, then we must examine our intention and also our level of understanding.” 5

I would like to note that my reference for this article is mainly Agenda To Change Our Condition by Syaikh Hamza Yusuf and Imam Zaid Shakir. If the reader finds ideas in this article as interesting then pray read that book as it covers these topics in-depth.

Let's change our condition!

Footnotes:-
1. Ibn Juzayy, al-Tahsil (Beirut: Dar al-Arqam, n.d.) I:69.
2. Sahih al-Bukhari [7:158]
3. Hamza Yusuf and Zaid Shakir, Agenda to Change Our Condition (Zaytuna Institute 2007) pg 2
4. A decent page that explains Zuhd: http://www.sunnahonline.com/ilm/purification/0067.htm 5. Hamza Yusuf and Zaid Shakir, Agenda to Change Our Condition (Zaytuna Institute 2007) pg 18-19.

A Soul in Troubled Water

Actually I am currently in exam week, which means I should be studying right now, but my short concentration span on numbers and Sum – with the big stylized S – brought me here. I often wonder what effect does dyslexia have on me nowadays, but I am pretty sure that my theoretical musing on this matter is just a form of escapism from admitting that I am just being plain lazy – at times.

I guess you must have noticed that the title of this post is the same as the ‘catch-word’ of this blog. Actually I got the idea for that ‘catch-word’ from my last year’s design course project, which I had to propose a design for the new Peace Bridge at Buffalo-Niagara – just a university course, nothing real, in case you are wondering. The name of the project was “A Bridge Over Troubled Water.” At the same time last year, I’ve gone through a lot of changes and some hardship – relatively, I admit I have an easy life thus far. Soul or in Arabic nafs, was something that concerned me a lot during that time - still do. I felt like I have never realized about its existence before, after all these years – amazingly, well maybe this is a bit of a hyperbola. It was the awareness about the condition of my heart and it’s hard to explain what it was about exactly. With that, a plethora of things regarding me – from personality to behavior etcetera – have gone through some reverse engineering processes. My best friend sum it up in a sentence as “the continuous evolution of ****” [my real name, censored]. I guess it must be at the very least perplexing, for someone who has known me for a long time to see me going through these facets of change. It is true that people change all the time, it’s all dynamic, but sometimes the changes are mild and sometimes they are drastic; more importantly I am not talking about changes per se.

Sometimes the physical body seems healthy, but the inner soul is in great turmoil. Sometimes we don’t even understand why we are in such and such condition. Actually we may intellectually understand why, but everything just seems so hard… Some say it’s just part and parcel of being adolescent, but I think it applies to everyone regardless of age or whatever. I have some friends who are currently in this so-called skepticism (if not Ghazalian skepticism) phase. The usual characteristic of this phase is the ‘uzlah period (the noun would be al-‘Azel), which I guess can be loosely translated to English as 'to retreat'. I had a conversation with a friend – more like a teacher-cum-friend to me – whom I call him as just abang. I don’t really know him actually, but he is one of those people I just feel at ease with. He said, “I’m running far right now.” I guess running here applies to both: metaphorical and literal. He continued, “Actually, I don’t know why I changed my personality” After I suggested that I’ve noticed even though I don’t know him that much, he concluded, “I don’t know, I don’t even know myself.”

How ironic, this seems to be a carbon copy of the condition of another friend of mine whom I barely know too, but for some reason I feel at ease with. There is nothing much that I can do, I realize that. Sometimes I am perplexed by the changes that are happening, and in the process, my selfish-self tries to protect my own self-interests. My apologies. I hope you can bear with my idiosyncrasies, which I don't understand them myself. As for my asking - just like them - it’s nothing more than I want you to be successful.

p/s: This blog will include some more personal posts like this from now on. I would like to remind myself from making all my emotions a public affair too ;) Hehe…